The Daily Phone Drama

Phone, I need to get to Charlotte.
I am dying.
I just charged you this morning! It took two hours, but you got to 100%, and you’ve been in airplane mode most of the day!
I am dying.
Ok, how long have you got?
26% charged.
Well, just plot the route to Charlotte and I can take a picture of the directions.
Route plotted. Battery now at 15%.
… Dafuq?
Battery at 4%.
No! No! Scrap Charlotte. Get me to the nearest Starbucks so I can charge you in the morning.
Did you mean any of the Starbucks in the last five states you’ve visited?
No, find me, find the Starbucks near me!
Did you mean Star Buckers 24-hr Porn Emporium in Duluth?
I hate you.
Powering down.
Wait, what town am I in? Tell me where I am!

I never know where I wake up.

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